Oh, my daughters, I love them so

Anne-with-an-e was looking over my shoulder when I visited Suzanne, at this post. Anne said, "Wow! She's young!"

I said, "I know she looks really young, but she's actually a little older than the 14 years that she appears to be. She's the mother of five boys."

"Five boys?!" said Anne. "We should send her some food."

*****

Ramona: "Mommy, can I have another straw? This one is too flavorful."

*****

Betsy:

Nothing to quote from her today ... just imagine a ten-year-old ... dancing and twirling and spinning and skipping. That's Betsy. I love ten.

The First Monday in Lent

Which has me thinking about the first Sunday in Lent. Yesterday's Gospel:

Filled with the Holy Spirit, Jesus returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness for forty days, to be tempted by the Devil. He ate nothing during those days, and when they were over He was hungry.

The Devil said to Him, "If you are the Son of God, command that this stone become bread." Jesus answered him, "It is written, 'Man does not live by bread alone, but by every word of God.'"

He also took Him up into a high mountain and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world in a moment of time. The Devil said to Him, "I shall give to you all this power and their glory; for it has been handed over to me, and I may give it to whomever I wish. Therefore if you will worship me, all shall be yours." Jesus answered and said to him, "Away with you, Satan, for it is written, 'You shall worship the Lord your God, and Him only shall you serve.'"

He also brought Him to Jerusalem, set Him on a pinnacle of the Temple, and said to Him, "If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down from here, for it is written, 'He shall give His angels a command about you, to guard you,' and, ‘They shall bear you up in their hands, lest you dash your foot against a stone.’"

Jesus said to him in reply, "It also says, 'You shall not put the Lord your God to the test.'"

When the Devil had finished every temptation, he departed from Him -- for a while.

Luke 4:1-13

A number of years ago -- it must have been nine years, because Anne was about four years old, and Betsy about 18 months -- I had my first inkling of real Lenten temptation. Oh, yes, in the past, I'd been through the temptation to eat chocolate, or to have a fat, juicy burger on a Friday, but all that seemed quite benign in comparison to a moment at Mass, the first weekend of Lent nine years ago.

I was still a relatively new Catholic, having been received into the Church just three years before. I was certain this would be the year that I'd be a shining, stellar example for Atticus of patience, faith and God's love. I would let Christ shine through me so clearly, so incredibly, that my husband could not help but be touched, and could not help but run to the nearest priest and beg to be brought into the Church.

I breezed through Ash Wednesday, not even missing the things I'd given up. I was too focused on being so good, for Atticus's benefit.

On the first weekend of Lent, we went to Mass on Saturday evening. Atticus was with me, because he had made a Lenten promise of his own: although he wasn't considering becoming a Catholic, he offered to go with me to Mass every Sunday in Lent.

Normally, he didn't attend Mass with me. And, since he stayed home, he often offered to keep our very little girls with him, and I zipped off to Mass alone. Though I longed for us to be "one of those families -- the ones who are together at Mass" I had to admit that I also enjoyed the experience of entering fully, quietly into the Mass, without distractions.

So, there we were, on the first weekend of Lent, all of us. "Together at Mass."

And, I felt impatient.

And uncomfortable.

And angry.

I'd had my daughters with me plenty of times at Mass, but this weekend it suddenly seemed different. They were acting like ... well, like little girls. Energetic little girls. They were squirmy, and loud and fussy (I learned, over the years, that 5:30 Saturday Mass is a tough one for little people.)

Atticus seemed oblivious to everything they were doing. It was impossible for me to be oblivious. I was frustrated with all three of them.

The church was crowded, warm and stuffy. I could barely hear the readings.

But, then, I heard this: "... led by the Spirit into the wilderness for forty days, to be tempted by the Devil."

And I was struck, perhaps for the first time, by two realities:

1. We are not alone in the desert.

2. We are being actively tempted.

We are not alone.

We, too, are led by the Spirit into the wilderness of Lent, but, we are not abandoned. And, we are not expected to do this of our own strength.

To be tempted by the devil.

Yes, certainly, I had, in the past, thought of Lent as a time of temptation, but I thought of it as "me against myself." I thought that if I had enough resolve, if I were good enough, it would be easy.

But, suddenly, in that stuffy church, surrounded by fussy children and a husband who didn't particularly want to be there, I realized that I had been tempted to impatience with the very thing I longed for with my whole being. My husband's conversion, which would translate into family togetherness at Mass, would mean this?, I'd been thinking. It would mean unpleasantness, distraction, impatience, anger? The desire to be here alone?

I was being tempted away from the good, away even from the desire to be the clear window through which Atticus could see Christ.

Only by God's grace, was I able to see the moment for what it was.

Temptation in the desert.

But, I was not alone.

The moment was redeemed by that realization. I reclaimed my longing for my husband's conversion. I knew that it would mean giving up "entering fully into the Mass" alone, but it would also mean gaining a new way of entering fully into the Mass: as a family. A loud, messy, imperfect, distracted, and sometimes-frustrated family.

I knew then that there would be many more temptations to come on this rocky road of my continuing conversion. I knew that there were forces at work trying actively to discourage me from praying for my husband's reception into the Church (which did not come until two years later.) I knew that these things would be, and would feel, stronger during times of fasting, when I was hungry -- both literally and spiritually -- and vulnerable.

First Sundays in Lent are still hard for me.

But, I know I'm not alone.

And that has made all the difference.

I will say to the LORD, "My refuge and my fortress, my God -- in Him will I trust."

~~ Psalm 91:2

Funny, it seems like yesterday to me

Ramona: "Mommy, will you put my hair in ponytails? Because it reminds me of the time when I was two."

My life in a cloud

Last spring, I did a word cloud:


I was just reminded of them, thanks to Helen, Dawn, Margaret, Amy and Maria.

I just generated a new one:


Hmmmm.

Apparently, we no longer unschool, (or homeschool at all), have finished reading Little Women, and I no longer write.

It's not exactly poetry Friday, but ...

I have a new favorite phrase that someone Googled which led that curious soul to my blog:

"Picture of a donkey eating waffles."

I wonder if such a picture was eventually found.

Occasionally, checking SiteMeter stats is a middle-aged woman's form of amusement.

I'm sorry to report that there is not a picture of a donkey eating waffles on my blog. Ramona did offer St. Joseph a waffle here, though, after Betsy had drawn a donkey. That's as close as we got.

Other favorites from yesterday's Google searches:

"What does 'hang-dog' slouch mean?"

"Bread needing."

I'm in need of some bread, too.

So, I'm off.

Have a blessed, grace-filled first-Friday of Lent.

"Welcome to Lent,"

she said, with a wry smile.

I awoke with a monster headache (thank you, Lord, for ibuprofen) ...

The girls' new MP3 player, for which they dutifully saved and saved, has died (thank you, Lord, for reminding us that we live with such luxury) ...

Our car may be dying. It's under the intensive care of its physician right now (thank you, Lord, for 15 years and 220,000 miles with that beloved car) ...

Lent.
Is.
Here.

Why we sometimes don't get anything done around here

Anne: Mom, I told Betsy that Slick is not a wolf.

Me: Huh?

Anne: Her Beanie Baby. It's not a wolf.

Ramona: Clearly, it's a wolf

Anne: No, I think it's a fennec fox. Look at the ears.

Me: Huh? What about the ears?

Betsy: Mom!

Anne: You can tell it's a fennec fox! Just look at it.

Me: Spell "fennec" for me.

Anne: f-e-n-n-e-c

Me: Well ....

Betsy: Mom, it's my Beanie Baby. And I think it's a wolf. I want it to be a wolf.

Ramona: Clearly, it's a wolf.

Me: (sigh)

Anne: Well, foxes have ....

Me: I think we should Google it.

My Brain: Do you really think you should spend time Googling a Beanie Baby?

Me, to My Brain: Yes! It's the only way to stop the madness. We're all too OCD to let go of this.

My Brain: Oh, bother. Go ahead, then. I guess it'll only take a minute.

Me: Betsy, I'm Googling.

Ramona: Clearly, it's a wolf.

Anne: A fennec fox!

[Google Results: Slick is a fox.]

Me: Well, Betsy, it says he's a fox, but if you want him to be a wolf, he can be a wolf.

Ramona: Ooooh, look at how cute that fox is.

Anne: But, Mom -- He's not a wolf. That isn't correct. He's a fox.

Me: It doesn't matter. He belongs to Betsy. He can be whatever she wants him to be.

Ramona: Clearly, he's a fox.

And so it begins

from today's Mass readings:

So even now, says the LORD, return to Me with your whole heart, with fasting, and with weeping, and with mourning. Rend your heart, and not your garments, and return to the LORD your God. For He is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, of great kindness, and relenting in punishment.

~~ Joel 2:12-13

I'm sending you away again

Because I don't yet have that really cool, better-than-a-blogroll widget thingy that Melissa Wiley has.

So, run off and read:

Lissa, on children's literature

Suzanne's gentle and lovely reflection on the earliest years of parenting little ones

Kristen, on The First Step of Lent

Willa, on everything

Katherine, on assessing where one may be in spiritual danger, and on her Lenten focus

The Way of the Fathers, both for Mike Aquilina's daily title puns (except today's post, in which he had, of course, the good taste not to pun) and daily excellence in Church history

Amy, to offer her congratulations on the best of news

Rebecca, being her wonderful self

Visit Coffee and Diapers

for a great post on Lent.

I love the "Hide the Alleluia" idea. We'll adopt this one this year!

The Loveliness of Lent Fair

Visit Nissa at Simple Gifts for the Loveliness of Lent Fair today.

And, don't forget to check in on her new blog, These Forty Days, created just for Lent and meant to serve as a central gathering place
for ideas, inspiration, support and prayer.

Ramona, overheard

Ramona, talking into her Little Mermaid cell phone:

"No, I told you! I don't speak Norwegian! Now, stop calling me."

~~~~~~~

Ramona, snuggling down into the covers at bedtime:

"Mmmmm ... I was made to sleep in this bed."

(The irony here being, of course, that she has never seemed "made to sleep" anywhere, for any great length of time, but we're getting there, we're getting there ....)

~~~~~~~

Ramona, having overheard some complicated explanations (another post in itself) I made to Anne and Betsy about homeless people living on the streets, and about why a person might be arrested for sleeping in a public place:

"But, Mommy," she said, eyes wide, "sometime I sleep at Mass ...."

~~~~~~

Ramona, after being assured that she will never be arrested for falling asleep at Mass:


"Whew!"

Too busy being loved

to write about it.

Yesterday, I received this sign from my little sweeties:

Other snapshots from our house:

Ralph the Hamster

Mr. Putter

Three scarves for three girls. Is it time to me to learn to purl and branch out a bit ... ?

I didn't like leaving St. Joseph and Baby Jesus out in our sub-zero temps. I brought them in, and they were promptly bundled and warmed by Betsy and Ramona.

Check in with Donna for more ideas

Donna Cooper O'Boyle has a really lovely article called A Mother's Lenten Strategies in her "Blogging Moments". Donna reminds us that, as mothers, we can very naturally give up our time and attention throughout Lent.

Donna recounts how one of her daughters used to say, "Mommy, turn your face here!"

How many of us have been asked to turn our faces there?

Turn to their stories, turn to their puzzles, turn to the marching band, turn to a Play-Doh creation ... turn and really look. Really listen. Turn to a squabble. Turn to a sad teen, turn to a young adult on the threshold of a new life. Turn and look. And listen.

Thank you, Donna, for a beautiful reminder that applies to every mother, every parent, at every stage of life.

One year I gave up complaining

In my last Lenten post, I forgot to mention another unconventional sacrifice I tried one year.

I gave up complaining.

Ouch.

I realized just how much I do it. And, that realization led me to pray, "Lord, help me to serve without counting the cost."

I wish I could say that Lent that year was so fruitful that I've never complained or grumbled again. That I stopped counting the cost, and I now always serve joyfully.

I can't say that. I can, however, say that it was enlightening and helpful.

It was a step on this journey of conversion that continues day by day, year by year, Lent by Lent.

I love the big leaps, but they don't always happen. When they don't, I'll take the small steps.

They're all leading toward the same Goal.

Buy your copies NOW

If you have not yet purchased copies of all of Melissa Wiley's books, head straight to Amazon.com, Bn.com, and your local bookstore and scoop up every new copy you can find. Because, soon, you won't be able to find new copies.

Ever again.

Lissa has been letting her readers know that things are changing for our beloved friends, Martha and Charlotte. It's not a pleasant change, either. Being Lissa, she does not harbor any ill will against Harper Collins for their decision to abridge and then reissue her books. She understands that publishers make decisions based on dollars and market trends. And, they must believe this is a savvy decision, from a bottom-line point of view (those are my words, not hers.)

But, this is so very sad.

It's sad from a number of points of view.

I'm sad that someone thinks he can pick up a beautifully crafted novel and simply chop part of it out to fit a length requirement. Isn't that akin to saying, "You need to lose a few pounds ... shall we just take an arm? What about a leg? It's all about the bottom line of what you weigh, isn't it?"

No. Really, it's not. It's about the beauty and complexity of how the thing fits together ... the mind, the limbs, the beating heart. How do we remove one of those vital parts?

And, I'm sad that someone thinks that children deserve "shorter" or "easy to read" or "less complex." Children deserve a quality story, and they deserve as many words and as many pages as it takes to tell that story.

And, I'm sad to know that Lissa won't be the one finishing out the stories of Martha Morse and Charlotte Tucker , whom we have come to know and love even more than Laura, Mary, Ma and Pa. My daughters and I have looked forward to Lissa's new books, ordered them with anticipation, jumped up and down when they arrived, and dug happily into them together. We've grown up, my girls and I, with these books over the last seven years.

With these friends.

I'm heaving a huge sigh here. An episode in our literary life is closing.

And I'm tearing up as I write this, because I'm remembering some correspondence with Lissa from a few years back, during the time when she wrote Across the Puddingstone Dam. She told me that she held in her mind (at least in part -- I'm sure she had other dear children in mind as well) my very sensitive oldest daughter as she wrote certain portions of that book. Something heartwrenching happens in "Puddingstone Dam," and this lovely writer and mother knew that she wanted to portray the episode in a way that was real, and moving, but not so traumatic that highly sensitive young souls couldn't take it.

She succeeded.

And, isn't that the kind of person that you want writing books for your children?

Reread Lissa's words here (especially the last four paragraphs) to understand why buying new books is important. (The only one of her books that is out of print and must be bought used, at this point, is The Road from Roxbury.)

Then head to Amazon. And Bn.com. And your bookstore.

I have full sets of Lissa's books for each of my girls, and I think of them as treasures worth passing on. You won't regret this purchase, I promise.

To our dear Martha and Charlotte ... oh, how we'll miss you.

To our dear, dear Lissa ... we know that you have many more enchanting and inspiring novels in you. And so, although we'll miss our old friends, we will also look forward to meeting and getting to know new ones, to sharing their lives and adventures the same way we shared the beauty of Little House ... no matter how many words, no matter how many pages ... no matter how long it takes to tell their stories.

Lent at our house

What shall we do with these forty days?

In addition to displaying our crown of thorns, which helps me to contemplate the sacrifice of our Lord, we'll do some of the following. We're still deciding what we'll do as I write this, ten days before Ash Wednesday. (The starred items are things we always do, in addition to learning new prayers, giving up a few things, and giving additional alms.)

*Operation Rice Bowl

This program is part of Catholic Relief Services. Each year, we get a cardboard "rice bowl" from our parish, and we fill it with the money we save through the things we've given up, such as meat on Fridays, sweets, and whatever else. This is such a great, concrete way for our kids to see that our sacrifices bear fruit: We didn't eat chocolate today? Someone in the world will be able to eat dinner tonight with the pittance we gave up.

See this page for resources to download, including a Lenten calendar that contains personal stories, statistics and simple, meatless meals.

*Lamb of God Calendar

On poster board, draw a large picture of a lamb. I have used, as a model, the clip art I found here. Divide the body into squares to make a calendar, covering the entire period of Lent. Each day, have your children glue a cottonball (or a few, depending on how big the squares and how eager the little hands) on that day’s space. This is a great way for little ones to count down to the great feast of Easter and it gives them a concrete picture of the length of the season of waiting. Ramona loved this last year.

*Lenten Caterpillar/Easter Butterfly
(This idea is from my dear friend, Holly, who is godmother to all of my children.)

Cut out 1/4 of a cardboard egg carton and have the children paint it for the caterpillar's body. Glue on "googly eyes" and use pipe cleaners for antennae and legs. Display the caterpillars throughout Lent. When Holy Week arrives, wrap your caterpillars in paper or coffee filters (their cocoons.) On Holy Saturday night (after kids are in bed) tear open the cocoon and replace it with a butterfly.

The butterfly will depend on the artistic skills -- or lack thereof -- of Mom and Dad. Our butterflies have ranged from drawings, to origami to a picture downloaded from the internet (that was a hectic year) to fun foam and sequins. Add to the symbolism of rebirth with a note proclaiming, “Jesus gives us New Life! Alleluia!”

I also just found this really cute idea from Abbey Press. It starts out as a caterpillar, but you rearrange it during Lent to turn it into a butterfly.

*Lenten (salt dough) Crown of Thorns/Crown of Glory

We just adopted this one last year, thanks to my great friend, Johnna. She invited us over to make salt dough crowns. We braided the salt dough, and formed it into a circle. We inserted six candle holders into the crown, one for each of the weeks of Lent. Throughout Lent, we lit a candle each week (just as we do in Advent) to "count down" the days and add a special sense of anticipation to the coming of Easter. We added Scripture readings and prayers.

When Easter arrived, we spray-painted the crown gold and decorated with silk flowers and ribbon. Johnna chose to break the toothpicks off when she turned it into a Crown of Glory. I left the toothpicks in, and liked the effect of the "gold rays" emanating from the crown.

Here's a link from Catholics United for the Faith, with a variation on this idea (the kids pull out a "thorn" for each sacrifice or act of kindness performed during Lent.) This crown looks very much like the one we created.

*Homemade Soft Pretzels

1 pkg. yeast
1 tsp. salt
4 c. flour
Coarse salt
1 1/2 c. warm water
1 tbsp. sugar
1 beaten egg

Measure warm water into large (warm) mixing bowl. Sprinkle on yeast and stir until it looks soft. Add salt, sugar and flour. Mix/knead dough. Shape dough into standard or your own special pretzel shapes.

Grease cookie sheets and lay pretzels on them and brush with beaten egg. Sprinkle with coarse salt. Bake at 425 degrees for 12-15 minutes.

*Sacrifice Jar

On Ash Wednesday, put out an empty jar and a bowl of kidney beans. For every sacrifice, prayer, act of kindness or penance performed, the children place a bean in the jar.

On Easter morning, your children will find the beans have been replaced with jelly beans, M & Ms or other favorite candy, reminding them that the rewards of Heaven will be sweet.

Holy Family Meal
(this idea came from an article by Maryann Davis Cochran, which I read years ago, somewhere ....)

Show your kids how Jesus and His family would have eaten. Sit on the floor (only wealthy people had chairs...) and serve 1st century fare. Fill pita bread with your choice of salad greens, onions, garlic, parsley, cucumbers, cheese and fish (I have substituted tuna for smoked fish or sardines ... my kids aren't that culinarily adventuresome.)

Remember -- they used plates, cups and knives, but not forks and spoons! For dessert, Jesus might have eaten a mixture of figs, dates or apricots, raisins, walnuts and honey. Eating this sticky mix with a knife or fingers will leave an impression on your kids. For the beverage, serve grape juice. Before and after the meal, read from the Old Testament, as the Holy Family would have (a good reading is the “Shema”, an ancient Jewish prayer from Deuteronomy 6:4-9).


(The following ideas have been collected over the years from a variety of sources, and I'm not entirely sure where credit properly belongs. Variations on these ideas are found in a number of places online. If any of these are original ideas of yours, please let me know) :

Lenten Chain

Make a chain from purple construction paper. Each day of Lent, each family member writes (on a purple strip) an intention for the day: a prayer, sacrifice, or penance they intend to carry out. Every few days, glue or tape them together into a chain, and keep it in a prominent place, reminding all of the spirit of Lent.

Jelly Bean Prayer:

Red is for the blood He gave.
Green is for the grass He made.
Yellow is for the sun so bright.
Orange is for the edge of night.
Black is for the sins we made.
White is for the grace He gave.
Purple is for His hour of sorrow.
Pink is for our new tomorrow.

A bag full of jelly beans, colorful and sweet,
is a prayer, is a promise, is a special treat.

Various crafts can go along with this prayer. Jellybean bracelets, mini-baskets, jelly beans wrapped in cellophane and given to friends as gifts ....

*Have You Ever Wondered Where the Easter Bunny Comes From?

We will again read this little booklet, subtitled, "a Children’s Tale of the Passion, as told by Radix." It's a wonderful story that places the Easter Bunny at the Cross. Unfortunately, Radix no longer publishes this coloring book, but check out what else the Radix Guys have to offer.

A Sacrifice a Day

Sometimes, for children, the idea of giving something up for six weeks is quite daunting. An alternative is to do "a sacrifice a day." From a central source, let your child choose what she will give up each day. The central source could be a list of ideas, posted in the kitchen. Or, cut that list into strips, place them in a jar and let the child choose one at random each day.

Stations of the Cross, for children

Visit this web page for an online set of meditations by Fr. Victor Hoagland. See Catholic Culture for another idea.

*Make your "New Year's Resolutions" now.

Lent is a time of renewal. I find Lent is a much better time than January to examine my life and reassess what I do.

What are we "supposed" to give up during Lent? There are some things that are prescribed, certainly, by the Church, such as meat on Fridays. And there are other things that are encouraged, such as giving up most or all "festive foods." But, sometimes, my unconventional sacrifices have borne unexpected fruit, too.

One year, I decided to give up listening to anything while I was in the car. It led to more prayer time (we happened to live about a half hour from everything at that time), more thinking time, and it led to being much more selective when I did start adding some "noise" back into my travel time.

Another year I gave up wearing earrings during Lent. Sounds silly, doesn't it? These days, I don't think of myself as a heavy consumer of jewelry, but I do have pierced ears, and there's usually something in them. But, giving them up helped me to focus on my vanity, and enlightened me as to how much I think about such things. And, now that I think about it, not being a heavy consumer of jewelry probably has something to do with Lent that year.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Do not dismayed daughters, at the number of things which you have to consider before setting out on this divine journey, which is the royal road to heaven. By taking this road we gain such precious treasures that it is no wonder if the cost seems to us a high one.

The time will come when we shall realize that all we have paid has been nothing at all by comparison with the greatness of our prizes.

~~ St. Teresa of Avila

Don't cry over spilled posts

I just spent a buncha time on a link-y Lenten post, and then my computer acted up and ate it.

Waaaahhhhh.

But, as Anne-with-an-e said, "Mom, don't cry over spilled posts. You'll just have to do it again. It'll be okay."

And, Ramona chimed in with, "At least you still have all your other posts! At least you still have Ramona posts."

Where do they get all this chipper optimism?

I need more coffee.

My crown of thorns

When I was received into the Catholic Church twelve years ago, my dear friend Jack gave me an incredible gift: a crown of thorns. This is not a miniature replica, nor a harmless likeness. It is a real, piercing, terrible, beautiful crown of thorns.

Every year, during Lent, it is prominently displayed in our home. It does wonders for my tiny Lenten sacrifices. A brief, but penetrating gaze upon the thorns penetrates my thoughts, my soul, my desires. It keeps my little offerings in perspective.

The sight of the crown that our King endured keeps me close in thought to Him, the Man Who gave everything for me, the One Who loves me no matter how weak I am, or how petty or selfish. No matter how much I may stray or grow lukewarm, He is there. He is faithful, waiting for the one He loves to return that love and fidelity. All. The. Time.

And that's what Lent is, for me ... a rekindling of the greatest love affair of my life. And, when I am tempted to think that my little Lenten sacrifices are too much, or too hard, I gaze upon that crown of thorns.

And I know that nothing is too much. He showed us what it means to give everything. The least I can do is feel the sting of my small sacrifices.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Places to find a crown of thorns:

Holy Land Imports
Rosary Workshop
Jerusalem Export House

More lives worth living

Please visit Kimberlee and Leticia, both of whom commented on my "A Life Worth Living" post.

Kimberlee has a beautiful post about her sweet little Elizabeth Faustina, a gorgeous little girl with a life worth living.

Leticia's darling Christina can be seen at Cause of our Joy. Leticia also has lots of great links to other blogs and to sites that offer more information on Down Syndrome. Just take a look at a couple of these:

Big Blueberry Eyes
Brady's Bunch
Emma Sage

Stop by, too, and visit Dani the artist and her sweet little boy, Quinn.

And, returning to that mom at the park ... In her words, "Isn't it a shame?"

Isn't it a shame that not everyone can see God's image and likeness in these beautiful children?

Our Timeline, for Theresa in Minnesota

Here it is.

It's not particularly elegant, not meticulously constructed (we taped together pieces of typing paper, but, hey, that's just us ....) but we love it. We use it. It works.

The bookshelf, by the way, does not usually look that clean and clear on top. To get a shot of the timeline, I moved a globe, a sewing machine, a box of sewing notions, two paper eggs and some Sculpey creations.

I'm thinking of this thread on 4Real, and am thinking of doing a "Loveliness of Messes" fair.

Loveliness has many different faces!

Lenten fasting is fast approaching

Visit Elizabeth for a beautiful explanation of sin, heaven and hell, and the reasons we fast during Lent. She tailored these words to her six-year-old, but we adults can embrace them, too.

And, go check out Nissa's new blog for Lent, These Forty Days. Plan to contribute something to the Loveliness of Lent fair, with entries due to Nissa by February 14th.

Universal words and work for mothers

Two beautiful posts, from two adoptive mothers, about the pain, the challenge, and the spiritual weaponry for dealing with Reactive Attachment Disorder:

Visit Helen and Diane.

I think the thoughts they express apply, in their way, to all of us. We are a fallen people, living in a fallen world.

Diane writes:

My greatest struggle in parenting a child who shows symptoms of RAD has not been with my child, but with myself. Anger, doubt, unkindness, impatience, despair...I have been there.

Yes, dear Diane, so have I.

And I don't have the added and extreme challenge of RAD.

How humbling. How in need of God I am.

Homemaking meme

Last night, as I was making dinner and mucking up what should have been an easy soup, it occurred to me that there's a reason no one has tagged me for the homemaking meme that's going around.

Hmmmm.

I'm going to do it anyway.

Aprons – Y/N
Sometimes. Sometimes it's an Alton Brown "I'm Just Here for the Food" apron, and sometimes it's a really cute, Christmas-y one that my dear friend Heather made for me. If I'm cooking with the girls, we all put on the aprons that Heather made for us. I wish I were a Heather.

Baking – Favorite thing to bake:
Chocolate chip cookies. (Oh, wait. Did you say to bake? Or to make in order to eat some dough?)
And brownies. (Assuming they are frosted.)

Clothesline – Y/N?
Yes, but I don't use it enough.

Donuts – Have you ever made them?
No! Alice said that pans full of hot oil scare her. Ditto. I don't even like to fry hamburger.

Every day – One homemaking thing you do every day:
Dishes by hand.

Freezer – Do you have a separate deep freeze?
Yes. I love it. If you had told me twenty years ago that there would come a day in my life when I would use "love" and "my deep freeze" in the same sentence, I would have been very frightened about what my future held.

Garbage Disposal – Y/N?
No. :-/

Handbook – What is your favorite homemaking resource?
You guys.

Ironing – Love it or hate it?
I hate thinking about it. Actually doing it is never as bad as I think it will be, but I so hate the thought of it that I don't do it enough. I guess we're rumpled.

Junk drawer – Y/N? Where is it?
I have a junk basket. It's on top of the fridge.

Kitchen: Design & Decorating?
Am I supposed to decorate in here?

(No, really, I do want to change it, because the previous owner's taste is not mine, though it's pretty neutral. But I'm not sure what to do with it.)

Love – What is your favorite part of homemaking?
The opportunity, luxury, and blessing of being home with my favorite people in the whole wide world.

Mop – Y/N?
I don't understand the question. Do I own a mop? Yes. How often do I use it? Well, I know I chose to do this meme, but some things are quite personal ....

Nylons – Wash by hand or in the washing machine?
I don't have enough affection for them to wash them by hand.

Oven – Do you use the window or open the oven to check?
I do both, depending on what's in there.

Pizza – What do you put on yours?
Pepperoni and green olives. Sometimes we do a white pizza -- chicken and alfredo sauce.

Quiet – What do you do during the day when you get a quiet moment?
Write. Think. Pray. And -- I never thought I'd say this -- knit.

Recipe card box – Y/N?
Yes. A gift from Atticus a few years back, when I asked for one. I recently organized it and now I use it quite a bit.

Style of house –
Ranch.

Tablecloths and napkins – Y/N?
Tablecloth, sometimes, for company. Paper napkins.

Under the kitchen sink – Organized or toxic wasteland?
It's an organized land of toxic waste.

Vacuum – How many times per week?
A couple.
Break up fights related to vacuuming -- how many times a week?
A couple.
(No, not that they fight over who gets to do it ... it's things like, "She wouldn't move when I had to vacuum that spot!")

Wash – How many loads of laundry do you do per week?
I've never counted. I do some laundry from start to finish each day, as I don't like to let it pile up.

X’s – Do you keep a daily list of things to do that you cross off?
Yes.
I
must
have
my
lists.

Yard – Y/N? Who does what?
Yes. We love our yard. Atticus does almost everything out there, including the garden. My job out there is to play with the kids and say things like, "I think we should try growing something new in our garden...."

Zzz’s – What is your last homemaking task for the day before going to bed?
Turn off the space heater next to the computer, and kiss my husband, and thank him for thinking that the soup I thought I'd mucked up was delicious.

(Soup photo thanks to Image Chef.)

Birthdays everywhere I look

Today is the birthday of my dear, forever-friend, Jack.

And, it's also the birthday of our beloved Laura Ingalls Wilder.

And, because her name isn't long enough for more links, here are a couple more:

DeSmet
Walnut Grove
DeSmet Pageant
Burr Oak, Iowa
Japanese fan website (yes, really....)

"Hello, Karen Edmisten, We have recommendations for you."

Isn't Amazon just so solicitous?

They're always thinking of me, always worried that I don't have enough to read, always looking out for my best interest. They're concerned about my kids and their reading lists, too.

They even -- diplomatically and oh-so-politely -- divert the dishonest soul who would steal my book-buying identity:

"If you're not Karen Edmisten, click here."

(I've never clicked there, as I'm sure a calamitous fate awaits the poor soul that dares to do so ....)

Recently, Mom-a-zon sent me the following recommendations:

Parables from Nature, by Mrs. Alfred Gatty

Fifty Famous Stories Retold, by James Baldwin

Sailing the Wine-Dark Sea: Why the Greeks Matter, by Thomas Cahill

Bless My Child: A Catholic Mother's Prayer Book, by Julie Cragon

Gloryland, by the sublime Anonymous 4

Recommendations from you, fair reader? Warnings? Rave reviews?

Anyone? Anyone?

Blessed Among Suzanne's ideas

Visit Blessed Among Men today for an easy, but meaningful activity involving hearts and Valentine's Day, our attachments, our true love, and my favorite St. Augustine quote:

You have made us for Yourself
and our hearts are restless
til they rest in You

She really is just four

Remember when Ramona corrected Little Bear's grammar?

Well, just to assure you that she's not as abnormal as that sounds, here is her latest:

"Mommy, please come see how we decorated Anne's horse. Look at what a good job was did!"

A life worth living

The opening paragraphs of this article, What's Lost in Prenatal Testing, brought tears to my eyes. Patricia Bauer, mother of a child with Down Syndrome, writes:

She was a fresh-faced young woman with a couple of adorable kids, whiling away an hour in the sandbox at the park near my home. So was I, or so I thought.

New in town, I had come to the park in hopes of finding some friends for myself and my little ones.

Her eyes flicked over to where my daughter sat, shovel gripped in a tiny fist, and then traveled quickly away. The remark that followed was directed to the woman next to her, but her voice carried clearly across the playground. "Isn't it a shame," she said, an eyebrow cocked in Margaret's direction, "that everyone doesn't get amnio?"

The cruelty of that comment is unfathomable to me.

I thought of our sweet and funny niece, Melissa. Melissa has Down Syndrome. In that mother's eyes, it's a shame she's alive.

I thought of our darling goddaughter, Jenny. Jenny has Down Syndrome. In that mother's eyes, it's a shame she's alive.

I thought of Jenny's dear brother, Michael. Michael has Down Syndrome, and has survived leukemia. In that mother's eyes, it's a shame he's alive.

Did that woman at the playground really believe it? I wonder if she could really look into the eyes of Melissa, and Jenny and Michael and say, "It's a shame you're alive."

She came close ... she simply avoided the eye contact.

The article wasn't completely depressing. By the end of it, I was able to smile with Margaret's mother about Margaret's job, her school roommates and her interest in the Red Sox and wrestling. I looked at Margaret's graduation picture and saw a happy young woman, and a proud family.

I thought again of Melissa. And of Jenny and Michael. I thought of their smiles, of their proud families, and of the happiness and love they have experienced and have brought to others' lives.

And I wondered how anyone could think they are "a shame."

We live in a sad and confused world.

Why am I thinking about dryer lint?

And, worse yet, why am I collecting it?

Oh -- you know why, don't you?

Because you love Lissa, too, and you read all of her blogs every day. And, therefore, you know exactly why I'm collecting dryer lint.

Because my kids are now extremely interested in its many uses, but most of all in the surprising and strange fact that you can make clay out of it. That idea came from another blogger we love: The Amazing Jennifer, the seafaring homeschooler.

It started with this.

Then progressed to this.

And, finally, we moved on to this.

Which, come to think of it, reminds me of the most recent silly kid argument around here. Anyone else have kids fighting over who gets to clean the toilet? We're so not normal.

I think they're my kids ...

But, given the things I heard yesterday, they may have been replaced by pod people.

Ramona: "Mommy, may I please have some more lettuce?"

Anne-with-an-e: "Mom! I don't think she should get to clean the toilet! I love cleaning the toilet!"

Betsy: "Mom, I think this Math-u-See stuff looks like fun. Can we order it?"

Groundhog Day

This particular observance doesn't carry as much weight around here as, oh, say, The Feast of the Presentation. But it does make me think of watching one of my favorite movies.

If you've never seen Groundhog Day, let me just say, it's a treat. It's thoughtful (and even theological, if you view it with a certain eye) and sweet, romantic and funny, and full of Bill Murray. I love Bill Murray (this Bill Murray ... not the Bill Murray of, oh, say, "Caddyshack.")

But, back to this movie.

I wrote this little "shrinklit" about it last year.

But, the movie's better. I hope you enjoy both.


Phil: at first, a selfish jerk
Focused on his fun and work
Women were a toy or game
Till every day became the same.

Quite suddenly, no rules apply
Steal some money, tell a lie
Nihilism's worth a spin
until despair comes crashing in

Suicide just didn't take
Surely something is at stake
Could it be that it is worth
Striving for a true rebirth?

Self improvement: worth a try?
Though all past ways it does defy?
Selflessness for its own sake?
Letting go of all that's fake?

Helping, saving, giving, tears
Authentic feelings, first in years
Letting go of all that's old
Lets in truth, releases cold

Something genuine and kind
Allows this man his best to find
Is this conversion? God at work?
Or one colossal cosmic quirk?

The Feast of the Presentation

From today's Mass readings, for this feast of Candlemas:

Mal. 3:1-4

Behold, I will send My messenger, and he shall prepare the way before My face; and the Lord, whom you seek, shall suddenly come to His Temple, even the Messenger of the Covenant, in whom you delight. Behold, He shall come, says the LORD of hosts. But who may endure the day of His coming? And who shall stand when He appears? For He is like a refiner's fire, and like fuller's soap. He shall sit refining and purifying silver, and He shall purify the sons of Levi, and refining them like gold and silver, that they may offer to the LORD an offering in righteousness. Then the offering of Judah and Jerusalem will please the Lord, as in the days of old, and as in years gone by.

I wanted to blather on today, but I couldn't

Because I've had lotsa, lotsa problems with Blogger.

I love you, Blogger, but you really exasperated me this morning. And now, you appear to be back and working, and I'm out of time.

Sigh.

It's sort of the same feeling we can get with our kids, you know?

"You mean the world to me, but I might toss you out the window in a minute."

The feeling always passes, and we never toss them out the window.

But, we do run out of time to blather.

I'll be back tomorrow.