Tanita Davis* shared the latest Poetry Peeps challenge:
Poetry Peeps! You’re invited to our challenge for the month of September! Here’s the scoop: We’re going to take up the challenge of tritina. Invented by poet Marie Ponsot, this less restrictive younger sibling of the sestina uses three repeated words to end three tercets. The order of word-endings for the tercets are 123, 312, 231, with a final line acting as the envoi, featuring all three words in the 1-2-3 order used in the first stanza. Additionally, we’re continuing with our theme of poetry in conversation, in whatever way that is individually defined. Sound a little tricky? Maybe? Are you still in?
I'm in!
I'd never written a tritina, and had no idea what I wanted to focus on. I sat down with my notes (123, 312, 231...) and thought, "But what kind of conversation?"
An image of a young student and teacher came to mind, so I rolled with the idea of a literal conversation about poetry. Here's the draft I came up with this week:
Making Room
“I do not like this stuff — poetry!” said
the boy in the back of the room.
“It’s stupid, so I don’t read it.”
The teacher nodded. “But if you never read it,
how do you… know?” she said.
Reticence in the room.
Then shifting. Glancing. A crackling room.
“I read a poem once, okay? And I hated it.
But, I could, I guess…try again?” he said.
“I mean, maybe,” he said softly, “there’s room for it.”
I played around with a variety of line-ending words and tinkered for a while with room/nodded/know, but I couldn't stick the landing on that draft. (Why am I using a gymnastics metaphor? I was never even good at somersaults.) I liked where that draft was going, but there's still something too wispy about it. I'll get back to you if I stick the landing on it, or nail the dismount, or figure out where these metaphors are coming from.
In the meantime, the Poetry Friday round-up is being hosted this week by the marvelous and inspiring Amy Ludwig VanDerwater at The Poem Farm.
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* Tanita's newest book, Berry Parker Doesn't Catch Crushes, just landed in the world! (And it's sitting on my nightstand, right now, waiting for me to start reading it tonight. Huzzah!) It's the latest in a long line of middle grade and YA goodness from Tanita, and I can't wait to dive in.
Photo thanks to Pixabay.
23 comments:
Karen, I love the conversational flow your tritina and the idea of just a little nudge to make room for something new.
Thanks, Tracey. It's my first attempt at a tritina, but I'll definitely return to playing with the form. :) I guess I've made room for something new!
'Reticence in the room' is a perfect, crystalline line. We *SEE* that room. We know it, we live it. Silence after a loudly egregious comment where we have to think about what we've said, and whether there's room to take it back.
This form is a challenge - it's hard to make it read naturally, but I don't feel the wispiness you do - you're close to landing on your feet with this... 😉
(Sheesh, I don't know why gymnastics metaphors come so easily, I was wretched at all of that. Why can't there be four square metaphors? Handball or soccer ones? We need something I was GOOD at!)
This is such an interesting and new to me form, and I am really enjoying reading all of the takes on it this week. Yours tells a story with a character making a change in so many few lines. I hope for him as I hope for all of us. And hey, gymnastics metaphors work just fine, whether we can cartwheel or somersault or not! xo, a.
I like this form partly because it is shorter and therefore somewhat less difficult than the sestina. I've like the ending that shows us the ambivalence of adolescence and why teachers or other adults might be rewarded by persisting when kids push them away.
* Tanita, thanks so much! Your comment on the reticence line made my day. :) The wispiness I feel is actually with the other version (the one in which I worked with the words "room/nodded/know" as line-enders, but I didn't share that draft here because it's so, so rough.) But I so appreciate your words.
And btw, I am halfway through Berry Parker and, wow, talk about knowing that room, living that room — you've plopped me right into the middle of ALL THE FEELINGS of 7th grade. Brava, friend! I'm loving it. ❤️
* Amy, thank you! And yes, know one really has to know that we don't *live* those metaphors, right? :)
* Janice, thank you! The other version I wrote of this one (I didn't share it here, just mentioned it above) has the teacher encouraging an overall spirit of inquiry in the room, with other kids weighing in too, but I haven't nailed that version down. :)
Good job with a challenging form. I like that it's a literal conversation, also how the word "room" is a physical room throughout except in the last line, where the shift in the boy's attitude has taken place. :)
Karen, I also am new to the tritina. You got the format and the conversational tone. I taught several young boys who felt the same way about poetry as your character. It takes a lot of gentle nudging to get a naysayer to change his mind to use the word maybe. I like the conversation you created.
Wow. I am impressed with your poem, Karen! I like it! Honestly, my brain kind of froze up, reading the directions for how to write such a poem! But then, it has been a really long week for me! I'll have to come back to this later …😊
* Jama, thank you so much! Yes, I played around with varying the word usage and that's the only spot where I was able to make it work. Of course, my words (said and it) didn't offer a lot of possibility for variation, lol!
* Carol, thanks! Poetry definitely has its share of naysayers. :)
* elli, thank you! My brain initially froze up too — thus the need for me to sit down with the word pattern/order in front of me. :)
I'd never heard of the tritina either, Karen, and as I read everyone's today, I'm realizing I completely forgot about the yearlong conversation theme. I'm an awkward conversationalist at best, so maybe that's why I keep blocking that part out :>D I really like this, especially the ellipsis before the "know" and that fabulous last line. Nice! And I'm looking forward to reading Tanita's book!
I'm enjoying reading all the tritinas, Karen. It's new to me, too. I like the way you out things in the context of a conversation. I think your character is curious about poetry and will give it a try - "there's room for it." Nicely done.
Oh, my gosh, that's a tricky form, and I so enjoyed what you did with it. I feel like the poem's student is what I used to sound like when I talked about poetry! Thank goodness a wonderful class--and teacher--set me on the right path.
* Laura, thanks so much! And I'm glad the conversation part of the equation wasn't uppermost in your mind, because the tritina you created was gorgeous. Maybe the "conversation" piece of it was the ongoing convo you're having with the melancholy of life lately. ❤️
* Rose, thank you! Here's hoping he makes a little room for poetry. :)
Susan, it was tricky and I think I'd like to try it again with a richer set of words. (I really limited myself by including "said" and "it" as two of my words, lol!) The right teacher makes or breaks it all, right?
Bravo! I gave up on my attempt. But, you make it look effortless. Well done.
I love how your three repeating words feel so off-handedly natural. The best compliment for a poem with repetition is that the form becomes invisible...as you have achieved. Well done! And great message, too!
* Linda, oh, how often have I given up on something that YOU make look effortless? Thanks for those very kind words, friend! xo
Mary Lee, you just made me feel so much better about working with the words "it" and "said"! :D I'd been thinking that I should have chosen richer words with more variance, but I'll take the win. ;)
Wow - you tritina creators are impressive this week! My favorite part was that "room" at the end, as our young skeptic opens up some figurative space. Thanks for sharing!
I love what you did with this challenge. How many of us have encountered this kid? I love the double meaning of the word “room”.
Thanks, Robyn and Margaret! Yes, I think we’ve all met this kiddo. :)
I loved this young voice so much!! Thanks for joining us!
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