Poetry Friday: A Brief for the Defense

Poet Jack Gilbert recently passed away. This interview in The Paris Review will give you a great sense of who he was.

Gilbert often wrote about love and loss, with searing accuracy, tempered with hope. A couple of weeks ago, after Gilbert died, Atticus sent me this poem.


Here's the last part of the amazing "A Brief for the Defense":


                                              ... We must have
the stubbornness to accept our gladness in the ruthless
furnace of this world. To make injustice the only
measure of our attention is to praise the Devil.
If the locomotive of the Lord runs us down,
we should give thanks that the end had magnitude.
We must admit there will be music despite everything.
We stand at the prow again of a small ship
anchored late at night in the tiny port
looking over to the sleeping island: the waterfront
is three shuttered cafés and one naked light burning.
To hear the faint sound of oars in the silence as a rowboat
comes slowly out and then goes back is truly worth
all the years of sorrow that are to come.


(Read the whole poem here, at The Poetry Center at Smith College.)

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The round up this week is hosted by Amy Ludwig VanDerwater at The Poem Farm.

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Advent

Actually, the world is beginning to look a lot like Christmas, but Advent is my story and I'm sticking to it.

That means I'll engage in a little Advent busy-ness Saturday, in order to start our preparations for Christmas.

The Advent wreath will come out:

The Jesse Tree will go up:

The Jesse Tree

Finding Jesus in the Old Testament

But a shoot shall sprout from

the stump of Jesse, and from his

roots a bud shall blossom.

The spirit of the Lord shall

rest upon him: a spirit of

wisdom and of understanding,

a spirit of counsel and of

strength, a spirit of knowledge

and of fear of the Lord.

~~ Isaiah 11:1-2

The Advent Calendars will appear. All kinds of Advent calendars. Lots of them:

Favorite Advent and Christmas picture books will gather in pagey clusters under the Jesse Tree. Because no one is ever too old for picture books.

Ramona's all-time favorite

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There's more, to be sure. More to do, more to blog about (and sometimes there will be more blogging about doing less. Less is more, when it comes to Advent.)

There's my No-Panic Advent series, which brings all of our ideas and traditions together in one frighteningly long post.

And there are other Advent link-ups to check out:

"Little Holy Days" will be hosted by Haley at Carrots for Michaelmas, along with Dualing Moms and
Molly Makes Do. Good stuff.

Bonnie Engstrom of A Knotted Life has a great video announcement here about her Advent series. (I'll be part of that one later in December.)

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So take a breath and remember -- Advent is not a marathon, not a competition, not an event, and not a reason to go crazy. It's preparation for the best birthday party of all time. Just think of the One you're preparing a party for -- you know what He'd say if you could sit down with Him and talk about the soiree:

"Don't go to a lot of trouble for Me. Don't wear yourself out and get stressed, okay? The only gift I really want is the gift of yourself. That's all. Pass the birthday cake. How did you know I wanted chocolate?"

Betsy Finished Her Novel!

Betsy finished her NaNoWriMo novel early, on Monday night, after a long, productive day (with interruptions for an outside class and homework.)

Her final word count came in at about 50,500, and she logged more than 8,000 of those words on Monday! I'm positive that's more than I've written in one day, ever.

This is her second year to tackle this hyper-speed writing project. She finished last year, too, and in her pre-NaNoWriMo days, she completed two novellas, bringing her total book count up to four.

I'm so proud of my novelist!

Recent Reading

1. We read The Search for Delicious, by Natalie Babbit, for Ramona's book club this month. I just loved it, and so did Ramona. Clever, magical, funny. Our book club party is coming up, so I'll report back soon on the food we've chosen. Each family will bring two foods they've deemed to be the definition of delicious.

2. I just read Meet the Austins and A Ring of Endless Light, both by Madeleine L'Engle. I want to live in Vicky Austin's grandfather's house.

3. Also just read a book about being frugal, although it's not really worth mentioning or offering a full review. It basically said: earn more money, spend it wisely, save as much as you can. Yeah. I've got those basics down. Fortunately, I also followed my own rule: don't spend money on books about frugality. Thank God for libraries.

4. Read Austenland, by Shannon Hale. Sweetly romantic, charmingly lightweight, a quick read. I was changing the ending in my head, but only a little bit, and I loved the surprises.

What are you reading?

Happy Thanksgiving

I'll be back to the blog this weekend. 

Have a great Thanksgiving! 

Dads and Daughters: 10 Not-So-Secret Secrets

I just read Meg Meeker's book, Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: 10 Secrets Every Father Should Know.

The book is full of great and valuable suggestions; the main takeaway points all have to do with strong and constant parental involvement, love, and action.

It reminded me that I am so grateful for Atticus, who is an excellent, loving, involved father and husband. And so, here are our

10 Not-So-Secret Things We've Done to Create Close Father-Daughter Relationships: 

1. Daddy sometimes fed the babies (and changed countless diapers, tossed babies in the air countless times ... but, hey, back to the food): 

I breastfed all of our girls, but there were times in those newborn days when I really needed a break in the middle of the night. He gave them bottles (either expressed milk or a bit of formula), cuddled, rocked them, and put them back to bed. Feeding a baby is a special kind of bonding, and I was so happy they got to experience that.

2. Daddy took care of the little girls when I went to help out at our parish one night a week: 

Weekly, year-round parish commitments can be taxing, and they haven't always worked for us, but when my girls were little, a weekly commitment to an apostolate I loved was a fun and welcome respite for me as a stay-at-home mom. It gave me a little break, some brain work, a booster shot for my faith, and it kept Atticus involved and having fun, one-on-one, with our little girls.

3. Father-Daughter Outings: 

Atticus has always been wonderful about taking the girls out on father-daughter dates, from the time the girls were very little. The dates continue to this day. Atticus is currently the main grocery shopper at our house, and he will often ask a daughter to join him for breakfast out and a shopping trip.

4. Father-Daughter Getaways: 

When I really need a break, Atticus and the girls head out of town for a night, giving me the gift of a quiet house.

5. Dad's Read-alouds: 

He always does one of our regular Advent read-alouds, and our traditional Christmas Eve reading, but he also sprinkles other reading with the girls throughout the year: Mark Twain, James Thurber, O. Henry, Shakespeare, To Kill a Mockingbird, bits of The Great Gatsby.

6. Nature Shows With Dad: 

He's known for calling a daughter into the room and inviting her to join him for something like Raccoon Nation, as he did recently with Ramona while the older girls and I watched Once Upon a Time. (Later, Ramona said to me, "Mommy, I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to watch a show about raccoons, but Daddy really wanted to, so I wanted to. And I'm glad I did! It was really interesting!")

It's not always a nature show. A couple of years ago, he called Anne-with-an-e in to join him for one of her favorite topics (yes, seriously): pandemics.  They were watching Influenza 1918 together when I pulled them away because we had to head to a violin and piano recital. (I was just reminded by Atticus and Anne, as I'm writing this, that on the way over, I accidentally mowed down a skunk ... I guess I was doing my part to bring nature back into the picture.)

7. Cooking With Dad: 

They see him cook. They eat his cooking. They sometimes cook with him. He has taught them that men can cook. He taught them about baking bread. It's that bonding-over-food thing that I mentioned in #1.

8. Their First Red Rose From a Man When They Turn 10 Years Old. Eighteen Roses When They Turn 18: 

This needs no explanation. It's just plain lovely.

9. Shopping With the Girls for Christmas, Easter, and My Birthday: 

Atticus and the girls always conspire to provide me with plenty of chocolate. (It might be as late as December 23rd for the Christmas shopping, but I'm not complaining. Somehow, he always gets everything done.)

10. Family Time: 

Whatever we want to do, wherever we want to go, he's game. His vocation as a father and husband is the top priority in his life, and he makes that very clear to us, through his words, his actions, and his incredibly sweet reminiscing about our girls from their baby days on.

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The bottom line is that Atticus is an interested, involved, happy father who talks to his daughters, listens to them, hugs them, protects them, feeds them, makes them laugh, teaches them, shares his foundational beliefs and his faith with them, and lets them know that he always has their back. Always.

It's no secret that I'm thankful.

From our '08 trip to Pennsylvania. 

Writing News From My Daughters

Ramona sent a poem to Highlights magazine last January. We had all pretty much forgotten about it until she received a letter from them last month, saying that her poem would appear in the December issue.

Highlights receives about 35,000 submissions a year from kids for their "Your Own Pages" feature. They publish 18-20 poems and drawings each month, so we were delighted for Ramona that her poem was chosen. She was, understandably, over the moon.

*****

Betsy is participating in NaNoWriMo again this year, and she's on target with her word count (goal: 50,000) so far. I've read her first few thousand words, and I think she's doing a great job. I don't know if I have her permission to discuss her plot, but I can reveal that she's tackling her own version of a sort of steampunk that involves Jane Austen and the future.

*****

Anne-with-an-e's writing this semester is mainly for school. She would probably urge you, "Nothing to see here, folks. Move along." I'm happy, though, about how quickly she's picked up on the way she needs to write for a comp class. I'm not the best teacher for essay/academic writing, and I love her current comp teacher for filling in all of the blanks I left. 

*****

And me? Just finished writing a book and now have to work on its revisions. That always makes me want to go rearrange a closet, but I'll try to keep nose to grindstone. 

"Hearing tell of sewing makes me want to sew, too."

So said Ramona yesterday as I read Little Women to her. 

Apparently, hearing tell of people using phrases such as, "hearing tell" also makes her want to talk that way.

Poetry Friday: Anne-with-an-e Leaves Me a Note

What are the benefits of raising children with poetry in the house? Upon arriving home, you get the delight of finding notes like this, from your college-age daughter:

This is just to say
I took the last 100 Grand bar
which you were probably saving. 
Forgive me, 
it was so caramel-y, 
and I just 
got my braces off. 

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The real "This is Just to Say" by William Carlos Williams can be found here.

Here is a link to a recording of Williams reciting the poem, which comes from this page at Penn Sound -- a treasure trove of audio links.

Here is a video of Matthew Macfadyen (my daughters are swooning) just saying that he hogged the last of the plums.

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The Poetry Friday round up is at Think Kid, Think!

Living Differently

A couple of months ago, the ever gracious and lovely Alicia Van Hecke asked if I'd like to be part of a new group blog she recently put together. I said yes. (Disclaimer: I haven't actually contributed anything to the blog yet ... I do hope to contribute something worthwhile at some point during this Year of Faith.)

The blog is called Living Differently. Here's a little about it, from Alicia's FAQ page:

What does your title mean?
Our title comes from Pope Benedict XVI's encyclical On Hope: "The dark door of time, of the future, has been thrown open. The one who hopes lives differently; the one who hopes has been granted the gift of a new life."

What is the purpose of this blog?
We live in a noisy world where it can be difficult to foster the important, quiet, intangible things that have not only life-changing, but also culture-changing potential, like the greatest commandment: Love God and love your neighbor. We're talking about powerful things like manifesting God's love in a messy world and the power of being a true witness.

This blog is an experiment in fostering these essential intangibles through prayer and study and providing a respite from important, but "noisy" topics that have a tendency to swamp these intangibles. So you will not find discussions here on politics or how to solve problems on the level of laws and government and voting. Instead, we will emphasize what we can do as individuals on a very personal level to live God's laws of love and change the world by changing ourselves.

Why have you chosen these particular books?
We will be reading a variety of books both spiritual and practical that we have found helpful in living our lives as Christians and Catholics. We have chosen books that are very accessible and engaging. Not all are Catholic, but we will be discussing them in light of our faith and use the Bible and the Catechism of the Catholic Church as our basic reference points.

Alicia is always brimming with Christian charity, and her focus is often something I try to focus on, too: working from the inside out. Trying to be the best Christian I can be. That's really all I can do, and all I want to do.

We all know what today is. That's right. It's 25 days before the first Sunday in Advent.

You may as well be obsessively calm and prepared. My (monstrously long) No-Panic Advent series can be found here.

Poetry Friday: In Heaven It Is Always Autumn

I love this poem by Elizabeth Spires in so many ways.

First, anything that links autumn and heaven is intrinsically right and just.

Second, for lines like this:

It is the last of many last days. Is it enough?
To rest in this moment? To turn our faces to the sun?
To watch the lineaments of a world passing?

Third, I love it just because it sprang from Elizabeth Spires, who is the author of The Mouse of Amherst, a book we love and one which I've posted about several times.

I hope this poem settles in your bones the same way a quintessential autumn day settles in, deep and golden and passing, but with the promise of warmth and unfolding regeneration in faraway days to come.


In Heaven It Is Always Autumn
by Elizabeth Spires

"In Heaven It Is Always Autumn" ~~ John Donne

In heaven it is always autumn. The leaves are always near
to falling there but never fall, and pairs of souls out walking
heaven's paths no longer feel the weight of years upon them.
Safe in heaven's calm, they take each other's arm,
the light shining through them, all joy and terror gone.
But we are far from heaven here, in a garden ragged and unkept
as Eden would be with the walls knocked down,
....

(Read the rest here, at The Writer's Almanac.)

Worthwhile links:

Folger Shakespeare Library, with a link to Spires reading this poem, and explaining its background, and a link to her Emily Dickinson Birthday Tribute Reading in 1999.

More about Elizabeth Spires.

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The Poetry Friday roundup is at Mainely Writes. 

(Photo thanks to Stock.xchng.)